Left hanging

  I met a guy recently that told me he was interested in having a purely sexual relationship; I told him that I was okay with that, but that it was a two way street.
  "Two way street?," he asked.
  "Yes. If it's just sexual for you, it is for me as well. I don't need a text message at 3 in the afternoon telling me that you're missing me. I don't need a phone call asking me how my day was. I don't want to meet you for coffee so you can tell me what's new in your life. I know that I won't be calling or texting you for any of those reasons."
  It might have been harsh, but I felt the need to lay out the ground rules from the outset. Don't get me wrong, he's an attractive guy and all, but a fuck and three minutes of improvised conversation do not a speed date make.
  Two hours after I'd met him and we'd fooled around I got a text message. I didn't reply. The next morning I got another one. I still didn't reply. Ditto later that afternoon, later that evening and the next morning. I then got an email via a gay social site I use. I can sum the communications up thusly: I'm thinking about what a great time we had and hoping that you're having a good [insert time of day here]. 
  Four days and quite a few texts later I sent a note of reply asking what he wanted. "I thought maybe we could hang out," was his reply.
  "Hang out?" I asked.
  "You know, grab a beer, watch a movie or something."
  "You want a purely sexual relationship. And to hang out. No thanks."
  "I'm bored. Why not?"
  At this point I decided that I was not going to reiterate my original thoughts. Friends and fuck buddies do not mix; if you need assistance figuring out which you are, chances are you're neither.


Feed the Locals

  The organic & biodynamic movement is in full swing across the country; it was just gaining speed in the north of Michigan when I left. Here in Eugene it permeates much of the food and wine scene; should the pair of buzz words become a trio with the addition of the word local, so much the better.
  Local, organic & biodynamic produce abounds much of the year, save the dead of winter when they truck things up from southern California--oddly to many this still counts as local even though it is shipped overland almost 900 miles. I have long agreed with buying local foods, if they're biodynamic, so much the better; money spent stays in the community and good farming practices benefit both the earth and the people, flora & fauna who call it home. Organic though, is a bit of a pox for me: I am not generally willing to pay the additional price for an organic (and usually much smaller) Fuji apple than it's local, non-organic (and usually much more robust) counterpart. I realize it costs more to grow the organic Fuji and that the increased cost will be passed on to the consumer, but I'm often not willing to pay it; if the apples were identical in size, perhaps, but until that happens, no. I'm also not willing to buy the organic Fuji bearing a New Zealand's Best sticker, when it's non-organic twin with a Washington stamp is sitting just beside; that some company thought I'd be willing to hand over extra cash for a Fuji that was flown 13k miles just to fill a gap in organic produce is beyond me--most organic eaters that I know show great concern for the environment, I wonder how they swallow the added cost of this organic gem and the hefty carbon footprint that was produced ensuring said fruit reached their shores in perfect form?
  It's not that I won't buy organic, I certainly will when I am presented with organic heirloom tomatoes at the Saturday market, just bletted medlars offered up at the holiday fair or hazy blueberry honey from my housemate's beekeeping friend: I will readily buy these items and savor the flavor and story that accompanies them. At the supermarket though, where non-organic and organic co-mingle, I save my extra pennies, nickels and quarters for the Saturday market. It makes sense to me to put my money where I know it will do the most.
  Buying local food is certainly a start to keeping money in the community, but buying local food directly from the co-op, person or collective producing it, seems to make even better sense to me. Exercising this option I garner knowledge about the food and the process behind how and why it is grown; I am able to ask questions directly to the person that was out in the field harvesting the beets that I will enjoy later in the evening or pull suggestions and wisdom from the farmer who grows tomatoes successfully down the road even as my own refuse to flower or fruit. It's not enough to simply buy local food though, there is a smithy in my community, a plethora of craftsmen who reclaim and repurpose cast off items, vineyards and breweries galore, designers and leathersmiths and more. Buying from these individuals helps to keep money and skill in the community as well. I'm not saying that big box stores and malls are anathema, they certainly have their place as well; I am saying that it often behooves us to look around a bit before we commit to the packaging and lowest price guarantees that abound...often a comparable item can be found at a similar price just down the road, the fact that it comes from my neighbor's daughters' shop is an added bonus.


Eat More Kale

  This afternoon on NPR there was a segment highlighting Vermont artist Bo Muller-Moore; he's engaged in a legal battle with Chick-Fil-A over his use of the phrase Eat More Kale. Apparently, his simple screen-printed t-shirt slogan infringes on the company's rights to its slogan (and the subsequent trademark...); Bo is on the record noting that apparently the folks over at Chick-Fil-A can't determine the difference between kale and chicken, he even goes so far as to give some basic education during his soundbite.
  After raptly listening to Bo's segment, I fired up Google so I could find out a bit more about Chick-Fil-A (not being from the South I'd never even heard of them...), observing a few of their ads on the web. I have to admit, seeing cows trying to sell me chicken is unsettling; even now I am envisioning a counter-campaign headed by upstart bantams, wielding miniature picket signs and making use of the chicken microphone.
  Peanut gallery questions?
a) When I Google "Eat More Chicken" does Chick-Fil-A get a penny every time I execute my search?
b)  If, in conversation or writing I utter/scribe, "Eat More (insert noun here)," am I in danger of enduring legal action?
c)  Has copyright & trademark law become so broad that it now covers phrasing that is substantially different from the original? I could understand problems with Eat More Chickens or Eat More Schicken; but I'm quite sure few people can confuse kale with the aforementioned animal protein.
d)  Which came first, the chicken or the kale?